Tips for overcoming online addiction
Aug. 23rd, 2011 02:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
felicitykingYes, there are plenty of articles written out there for how to overcome it, except they aren't written for people like me. Those articles assume one has lots of friends, a sane family, and a fulfilling career. I know I am online too much. However, I can't go cold turkey from it like those articles suggest because:
1. My FRIENDS are online. I might not know many of you personally; I might not know many of us intimately, but I can relate to FAR better than I can many of the people I know in real life.
2. My INTERESTS are online. Nobody I know in real life gives a fuck about fandom, about tumblr, twitter or livejournal. Nobody I know wants to discuss pop culture the way I do.
If I "broke" my online addiction, I would basically be left as a pathetic loser. However, I do think it is important to be online less as I do need to read more, watch movies more, and exercise more. Go out exploring my town more. It's been a 2 year struggle for me to overcome my dependency to being online all the freaking time, and while I still struggle with it, I have come up with things that help me to stay off it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh, and for me it has helped knowing what drives me to stay online. Stress and depression. My vague excuse last year was "I like to relax when I come home from work." Well, that is true but not quite. More like " I can't deal with the fucking craziness at work, and the best way to cope with it is come home and see what awesomeness is on tumblr and livejournal. And, getting to read that I'm not the only one who has a shitty life." Depression too drives me to be online. (I find it VERY hard to read/do slow things when I'm depressed. I need the energy being online gives me to cope.) If you can identify why you are online so much, it can help you to cope on the days when you're not the laptop.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1. Start on a day you have to work. It's NOT cheating. It's far easier to stay off the computer if you only have the fight your addiction HALF the day as opposed to a WHOLE day. Believe me, you'll still be biting your nails & trying to come up with a valid reason you. must. get.online. Do this once a week until a half day doesn't bother you then switch to a full day.
2. Mimic what you do online. If you have your mp3 player when you are online, have that in background. If you have the TV on when you are online, turn that on. Don't try to do something dramatically different from what you do when you are online. The only difference is you are doing these things but NOT with the laptop stimulus. It will help you to cope with not being online.
3. Start slow. Do half days first (ex: staying offline after you get home from work). Once you are comfortable with that, increase it to a full day. That first full day is going to feel like the longest ever, but by the time you do it for a first time, your brain should be trained to handle the boredom. Keep lots of books, magazines, a fully charged mp3 player, and movies at the ready to conquer boredom. It's not TOUGH to stay offline that first full day, but filling it UP is. But you can do it.
4. After you've realized you can stay offline a full day once a week, challenge yourself to stay off 2 full days a week. Then slowly (always wait until you are comfortable), increase it to every other day. Then try doing it consecutive days in a row.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The most I've ever stayed offline is 3 consecutive days in a row, and right now that's where I'm most comfortable at. I don't think I would ever spend a full week online simply because....all my interests are online and they tend to pile up quickly if left alone for too long.
One thing that HAS surprised me is that once one is comfortable with staying offline, one doesn't want to get on it. I wake up thinking "I'll read it today." Or "I'll watch movies today" and do just that and don't miss being online. The great thing about the internet is that...baring a virus or a website malfunction...the sites are still there. They aren't going anywhere. And people don't care when you respond back to their posts as long as you make clear you are reading them, and care about them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lastly, don't feel guilty if you mess up. The nice thing about online addiction is that it isn't like smoking or drinking. July killed my progress simply because
1. too much going on in the entertainment, royalty and celebrity worlds. Too much damned interesting stuff to stay offline for. I'm a pop culture freak, I'm not staying offline when the last HP is premiering or when Zara Phillips is marrying! I want the picspams and to cry and laugh with everybody else!
2. Work was a killer and my depression came back swinging. Yes, it was a sucky month in my real life. Being onine helped keep me rational and sane and able to cope with the feelings of being overwhelmed and overworked.
However, I knew I could stay offline once I had my depression back in check and work settled down. So I went back to doing half-days again and working on full days. It's not like starting all over because I've been at it long enough to know I can. (Two back to back half-days offline nearly killled me. But I knew today I was going to be on tumblr, LJ, and watching some movies I downloaded. And that I can spend the next 2 days half-days offline.)
BUT YOU DO HAVE TO WORK AT IT! It's sooooo easy to say "I need to get online because...." Well, no, you don't. It will take time, but you will figure out the difference between petty and important reasons for getting online. And, you're not locking your computer away forever. (Which is what all those stupid ass "break your computer addiction" articles think you do.) You're not going cold turkey and ending your online life forever. (Which is basically the end-all and be-all of all those ridiculous "how to break your online addiction" articles written for normal people.) You are just working on stay offline MORE so you can focus on things you don't do as often in real life as you once used to. (I definitely read much more since I've learned to stay offline. And it makes me excited to know I'm reading again. 26 books so far this year.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Anyway, I know this goes contrary to every "break your computer addiction" article out there, but it is what works for me. Not saying it will work for everyone, but if helps anybody, even just a little, then I'm happy with my contribution.
1. My FRIENDS are online. I might not know many of you personally; I might not know many of us intimately, but I can relate to FAR better than I can many of the people I know in real life.
2. My INTERESTS are online. Nobody I know in real life gives a fuck about fandom, about tumblr, twitter or livejournal. Nobody I know wants to discuss pop culture the way I do.
If I "broke" my online addiction, I would basically be left as a pathetic loser. However, I do think it is important to be online less as I do need to read more, watch movies more, and exercise more. Go out exploring my town more. It's been a 2 year struggle for me to overcome my dependency to being online all the freaking time, and while I still struggle with it, I have come up with things that help me to stay off it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh, and for me it has helped knowing what drives me to stay online. Stress and depression. My vague excuse last year was "I like to relax when I come home from work." Well, that is true but not quite. More like " I can't deal with the fucking craziness at work, and the best way to cope with it is come home and see what awesomeness is on tumblr and livejournal. And, getting to read that I'm not the only one who has a shitty life." Depression too drives me to be online. (I find it VERY hard to read/do slow things when I'm depressed. I need the energy being online gives me to cope.) If you can identify why you are online so much, it can help you to cope on the days when you're not the laptop.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1. Start on a day you have to work. It's NOT cheating. It's far easier to stay off the computer if you only have the fight your addiction HALF the day as opposed to a WHOLE day. Believe me, you'll still be biting your nails & trying to come up with a valid reason you. must. get.online. Do this once a week until a half day doesn't bother you then switch to a full day.
2. Mimic what you do online. If you have your mp3 player when you are online, have that in background. If you have the TV on when you are online, turn that on. Don't try to do something dramatically different from what you do when you are online. The only difference is you are doing these things but NOT with the laptop stimulus. It will help you to cope with not being online.
3. Start slow. Do half days first (ex: staying offline after you get home from work). Once you are comfortable with that, increase it to a full day. That first full day is going to feel like the longest ever, but by the time you do it for a first time, your brain should be trained to handle the boredom. Keep lots of books, magazines, a fully charged mp3 player, and movies at the ready to conquer boredom. It's not TOUGH to stay offline that first full day, but filling it UP is. But you can do it.
4. After you've realized you can stay offline a full day once a week, challenge yourself to stay off 2 full days a week. Then slowly (always wait until you are comfortable), increase it to every other day. Then try doing it consecutive days in a row.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The most I've ever stayed offline is 3 consecutive days in a row, and right now that's where I'm most comfortable at. I don't think I would ever spend a full week online simply because....all my interests are online and they tend to pile up quickly if left alone for too long.
One thing that HAS surprised me is that once one is comfortable with staying offline, one doesn't want to get on it. I wake up thinking "I'll read it today." Or "I'll watch movies today" and do just that and don't miss being online. The great thing about the internet is that...baring a virus or a website malfunction...the sites are still there. They aren't going anywhere. And people don't care when you respond back to their posts as long as you make clear you are reading them, and care about them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lastly, don't feel guilty if you mess up. The nice thing about online addiction is that it isn't like smoking or drinking. July killed my progress simply because
1. too much going on in the entertainment, royalty and celebrity worlds. Too much damned interesting stuff to stay offline for. I'm a pop culture freak, I'm not staying offline when the last HP is premiering or when Zara Phillips is marrying! I want the picspams and to cry and laugh with everybody else!
2. Work was a killer and my depression came back swinging. Yes, it was a sucky month in my real life. Being onine helped keep me rational and sane and able to cope with the feelings of being overwhelmed and overworked.
However, I knew I could stay offline once I had my depression back in check and work settled down. So I went back to doing half-days again and working on full days. It's not like starting all over because I've been at it long enough to know I can. (Two back to back half-days offline nearly killled me. But I knew today I was going to be on tumblr, LJ, and watching some movies I downloaded. And that I can spend the next 2 days half-days offline.)
BUT YOU DO HAVE TO WORK AT IT! It's sooooo easy to say "I need to get online because...." Well, no, you don't. It will take time, but you will figure out the difference between petty and important reasons for getting online. And, you're not locking your computer away forever. (Which is what all those stupid ass "break your computer addiction" articles think you do.) You're not going cold turkey and ending your online life forever. (Which is basically the end-all and be-all of all those ridiculous "how to break your online addiction" articles written for normal people.) You are just working on stay offline MORE so you can focus on things you don't do as often in real life as you once used to. (I definitely read much more since I've learned to stay offline. And it makes me excited to know I'm reading again. 26 books so far this year.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Anyway, I know this goes contrary to every "break your computer addiction" article out there, but it is what works for me. Not saying it will work for everyone, but if helps anybody, even just a little, then I'm happy with my contribution.
